HELLO! LOOK!

Day 6: Wearing cosmetic lenses daily

2012-02-13T19:14:00.000+08:00

It's day 6 today!

And the problem to be addressed today is wearing cosmetic lenses daily!

One of the misconceptions that people have is that cosmetic lenses can be worn daily and can even replace contact lenses..

And they are so cheap compared to contact lenses!

Cosmetic lenses cost probably about $20? but contact lenses are a lot more expensive and what's more some cosmetic lenses you can wear them for like 1 year so it's super worth it.

But... can they be replaced??

NOOOOO!

In fact, coloured contact lenses may result in compromised vision as the artificial pupil it creates for wearers are non-altering and will not be able to constrict and dilate to accomodate users' viewing needs. The pigments that are present in coloured contact lenses also cause greater accumulation of dirt, making cleaning more challenging than usual.

So wearing coloured contact lenses won't make you see any clearer and makes it even harder to clean!

But again, I'm not saying that you shouldn't wear cosmetic lenses!

But you probably should reserve it for special occasions:)

And also, if you wear it everyday, people will take that look as a normal look. So even if you wear it on occasions that you feel special, you probably feel the same with the same lenses on.

But if you wear it on special occasions, people will think you look different and prettier! And you will also feel different!

Remember the Misaki con's coloured contact lens which I received it in my ambassador's kit? I'll be wearing it for the special occasion tmr...:)

So remember to check back tmr for my final post on Valentine's Day!

Still not sure where I'm going yet but i'm sure it'll be nice no matter what:)

Always ensure the health of your eyes, for you'll be rewarded with sights truly worth keeping.

Day 5: Wearing contact lens pass its replacement date

2012-02-12T14:48:00.000+08:00

Hello!

It's day 5 of the 7 days challenge today!

And i'll be addressing the problem of wearing contact lens pass its replacement date!

Actually a lot of people don't realise they have worn their contact lens pass its replacement date until like maybe their eyes start to sting for when their eyes get too dry.

This might be because they're too busy to get new contact lens so they have no choice but to continue wearing the existing ones or simply because they forgot all about it.

Actually the purpose of replacing contact lens on a frequent basis is to prevent discomfort, dryness, blurred vision or allergic reaction that can result from a build-up of protein and lipid deposits on the lenses. And even if these symptoms do not show, wearing contact lenses pass its replacement date will subject your eyes to greater risk of the occurrence of these symptoms.

So what can you do?

1) You can purchase in bulk! In this case, you can change your contact lenses regularly without the hassle of buying them every time you run out of it. And anyway, it's cheaper to purchase in bulk right! So you save the time, save the money, and save your eyes! hahaha.

2) You can track your purchases on a calendar! Like the most convenient way will be noting it down on your mobile phone and you can even set reminders for it!

But best is you set one day before at night so you can prepare them for the next day!

hahaha. and now everybody knows i use biomedics lol!

so yup, that's all for today!!

Always ensure the health of your eyes, for you'll be rewarded with sights truly worth keeping.

Day 4: Wearing contact lens for prolonged period of time

2012-02-11T11:20:00.001+08:00

Hello it's day 4 today!!

Today we're gonna talk about the problem of wearing contact lens for a prolonged period of time.

And I feel this is definitely the most common thing contact lens wearer do.

Especially if you're in university, you'll most probably spend the bulk of your time in school or outside, so you will definitely wear your contact lens for a very long time!

Like for me, because i'm on attachment right now, I will wear my contact lens from about 7am in the morning to about 10pm at night. and that's like 15hrs of continuous wear!

Plus that is IF i come home at 10pm because normally i reach home even later lol.

If you include weekend, i am basically wearing it every day for very long hours.

The recommended hours for wearing contact lens is 8 to 10 hours continuously for up to 5 days a week.

oh no i definitely did not do that :/

And do you know?

Wearing contact lens for long hours deprive eye tissues of oxygen and encourages the growth of bacteria which thrives in anaerobic environment.

Contact lens also block the film of tears of the cornea, thus hindering its crucial role of washing out bacteria of the cornea. When contact lens are worn for long hours, there is an increased risk of eye infections.

Sound serious? That's why you must always take good care of your eyes!

So try to not wear them so often like bringing your spectacles with you all the time so that when you feel like your eyes are too dry, take your contact lens out and wear glasses instead.

Or try to only wear them when you REALLY need them like during interviews or dates:)

But of course if it is required for you to wear them for the whole day, bring your lubricating eye drops with you to prevent dry eyes!

And try not to wear contact lens on weekends to let your eyes rest!!

Just like how you need to rest on weekends too! hahaha.

and again,

Always ensure the health of your eyes, for you'll be rewarded with sights truly worth keeping.

Day 3: Lack of regular eye checks

2012-02-10T15:00:00.001+08:00

Hello from me again!

It's day 3 of the 7 days challenge!

Actually if you realise, the last day of challenge is 14th February hahaha so I will be blogging about my valentine's day!

And jinquan doesn't read my blog so i can just say...... I havent thought of what to buy/make him!

Now I can probably only give him a structural plan of our "future" bungalow LOL. Good practising too! hahaha

anyway, the problem to be addressed today is the lack of regular eye checks!

If you're a regular contact lens wearer, you should probably get your eyes checked at least once a year. It's like your car, your air con, the building (which is actually visual inspection haha), it needs servicing regardless of whether there's discomfort or not.

Of course, there are other situations where you'll need eye checks.. like when there's redness, swelling, itch or other symptoms of eye infections. No matter what, always seek professional advice and do not attempt to treat it yourself!

Eye checks are important because

1) it ensures that prescription is up to date (wrong degree?)

2) check the health of your eyes

3) check the curvature of your cornea

4) Inspect the eye for microscopic complications related to wearing contact lens (detect it early!)

5) there might be abnormal blood vessel growth related to a lack of oxygen to the cornea

So remember to go for your annual eye checks!

I had mine about half a year ago and that was when i found that that I have a permanent scar on my left eye.. and the optician also told me that there are blood vessels around my iris and that i should take note..

that's why they recommended a more expensive kind of contact lens for me LOLLLL.

But it is REALLY good! And the optician is so pretty and nice i don't mind going back for more eye examinations hahaha!

I remember last time when i go for eye examinations in school, I will take out my spectacles and then read the number like i know them because i memorised them HAHAHA. the nurse will always roll their eyes at me lol okay i'm imagining that part because how would i know man i can't see without my glasses haha.

Alright, check back tomorrow for more!

And Remember,

Always ensure the health of your eyes, for you'll be rewarded with sights truly worth keeping.

Day 2: Lack of proper cleaning procedures

2012-02-09T19:01:00.004+08:00

Hello it's day 2 of the 7 day challenge! :)

Today I'm gonna talk about problem of lack of proper cleaning procedure for contact lens!

In my opinion, i actually feel that this is the main cause for the many cases of eye infections!

Because everybody is simply too lazy! hahaha!

I mean like the solution looks clean........... so why change?

hahaha. Seriously, i used to not change the contact solution for at least 3 days because it looks normal! So why bother cleaning it might as well save me all the trouble!

until eye infections come in.......... then i know THAT is the REAL trouble LOL.

Cleaning of contact lens is really very important, especially if you are wearing permanent contact lens or monthly disposable contact lens. This is because there are bacteria, proteins, oils, allergens in your contact lens, and they build up as you wear them. Thus at the end of the day, if you do not disinfect them properly, or disinfect them by using infected water (not changing your solution), it's actually very easy to get eye infections.

So unless you're wearing dailies, continue reading please!

Because I'm gonna show you how to clean your contact lenses!

Step 1: Wash your hands!

Not only with water but with soap and water!
Because after one whole day your hands are probably saturated with germs already and if you use them to take out the contact lens from your EYES, ewwwwww.

Step 2: Clean, rinse, and disinfect!

Even though the solution says it contains a no rub formula or things like that, it is still better for you to rub it because it is safer and i doubt the solution has such high abrasivity that it can clear your contact lens of the germs that you accumulated for a whole day!

and that is provided you clean them properly the day before lol.

And also remember to always use contact lens solutions recommended by eyecare professionals! Never use tap water! Because water alone are inadequate in disinfecting the lenses and can even lead to lens contamination. In some cases, it may cause irreparable harm to your eye.

And finally step 3! To soak your contact lens in contact lens solution!

Remember, everytime you remove your contact lens, you need to clean them!

Do not give in to lazinessssss hahaha.

Last but not the least,

Always ensure the health of your eyes, for you'll be rewarded with sights truly worth keeping.

Day 1: Purchasing from unauthorized retailers

2012-02-08T00:06:00.003+08:00

Hello!

I received my ambassador's kit yesterday!

They include MISAKI's cosmetic contact lens

eye drops

Contact solution

And a facial mask!

I dunno what's the facial mask for actually but probably to prepare us for Valentine's Day? hahaha.

Anyway, today is Day 1 of the 7 day challenge!

And I will be addressing the problem of purchasing from unauthorized dealers today.

These few years, there have been a lot of unauthorized cosmetic lens retailers in the market. They usually come in the form of blogshops, and they are being established at an increasing rate.

A lot of such businesses are set up by students, with some as young as 15. They simply look for a cheap supplier, upload some pretty images and provide basic information of the contact lens, provide payment details and they are good to go.

These contact lens usually range from about $9 to $35. As compared to buying from authorized dealers which can cost more than $100, buying contact lenses online seems to be a good way out. However, because these blogshops aim to make "easy money", they do not care if their products are safe. So even if you go looking for them with a problem of their product, they shirk responsibility or they can simply close down their blogshop and open another one.

However, I can also understand why people would want to buy from online retailers. They are so convenient, so cheap, and most people would think that they won't be so unlucky as to get eye infections. But perhaps you can be considered lucky just getting an eye infection because some people get corneal ulcer which causes acute burning pain and if not treated early may even lose their eyesight!

So everybody please think twice before buying or you might end up paying more!

But i'm not saying you shouldn't buy contact lens online..

You can buy them!

Just be careful to look out for websites which are not registered with HSA because they might be unsafe!

Going back to the ambassador's kit, I am given a pair of MISAKI's cosmetic contact lens!

And i must say their packaging is so nice! hahaha

Misaki is registered with HSA on supply of medical products regulation so you can purchase from them it's safe!

check out their website here: http://www.misakicon.com/index.php

They have 6 types of lenses and they come in a variety of colours, very pretty!

I havent tried mine on yet gonna try them tmr so i'm excited! hahaha

Misaki's lenses are also distributed in several optical shops you can check them out here:
http://www.misakicon.com/wheretobuy.php

It is important that you purchase from authorised retailers because unknown products can be unsafe so don't be penny wise but pound foolish!

Remember: Always ensure the health of your eyes, for you'll be rewarded with sights truly worth keeping.

7 Day Challenge!

2012-01-30T22:05:00.009+08:00

Do you wear contact lens?

Sometimes, do you find that you are suffering from one or more of the following symptoms?

• Red eyes
• Eye discharge (watery, mucus, pus)
• Eye discomfort / pain
• Eye swelling or swelling of tissue surrounding the eye
• Persistent itching• Blurring vision
• Flaking of the eyelids

Because if you have, then you might be suffering from eye infections caused by wearing contact lens!

but fret not!

Because your friend here (ahem..) is appointed as one of the 7 youth ambassadors of "At first sight"!

So what is "At First Sight?"

It is a youth oriented contact lens care campaign that stresses the importance of proper cleaning and tending of contact lens amongst university students. The campaign arises due to an increasing trend of contact lens usage by youths for the purpose of a beautified appearance. However, the lack of proper contact lens care results in a higher risk of eye infections and other health problems. "At First Sight" hopes to communicate the message of prioritizing eye health above appearances because the sights you share with your loved ones are the sights truly worth keeping.

For 7 days from 8th February to 14th February, I will be blogging EVERYDAY (omg it's such a challenge for me hahaha!) about good contact lens care!

Those who do not wear contact lens, you can read it too if you're planning to get contact lens in the future!

Some of the issues addressed in the 7 days are habits such as

1. Wearing contact lens for a prolonged period of time

2. Wearing contact lens that are expired

3. Purchasing from unauthorised retailers

4. Wearing cosmetic lenses daily

5. Lack of proper cleaning procedures and regular eye checks

If you have such habits, then you better check out my blog daily from 8th Feb to 14th Feb if you dont want any eye infections hahaha!

And and and!
If you havent already done so,

check out https://www.facebook.com/ProjectAtFirstSight

and remember to like their page!

and also like my video:)

it's currently the best performing video HAHAH!

and everybody is saying jinquan and i look alike lol. dunno to be happy or sad la haha

But jinquan keeps saying it's because i also have hou dao BUT I DON'T OKAY! lol!

but of course, you can also check out their official website at www.projectatfirstsight.com!

You can find me under "ambassadors" :)

You may think this whole post doesn't concern you.......

but here comes what you might be interested in.... a photography contest!

still doesn't concern you?

.... and up to $300 cash to be won!!

NOW that concerns you HUH.

Pair up with anyone you like and snap a photo which has significant meaning to the both of you!

It can be anything! Say why it means so much to the both of you in 150 words and submit to projectatfirstsight@gmail.com by 5th February 2012!

Then ask your friends to vote for you from 6th February 2012!

However, this competition is open to all NTU, SMU and NUS full time undergraduates only!
But don't have to be both of you, just at least one from each pair is good enough:)

So if you're from NTU and your partner is a working adult earning 5 million a year, you're good!

or if you're from NUS and your partner is working in a kopitiam selling wanton mee, you're good!

or if you're from SMU and your girlfriend is from NTU (.. like me LOL) then of course you're good!

HAHAHA!

you have about 5 more days before the deadline!

jiayou!!

check back regularly for updates:)

At first sight.

2012-01-28T00:10:00.003+08:00

Hello everybodehhhh!!

Just wanna say that I'm on youtube!!!

lol okay zhilin must be rolling her eyes now HAHAHA

anyway i'm helping my friend with her fyp project "At First Sight" so i hope everyone can help me go like her facebook page:)

https://www.facebook.com/ProjectAtFirstSight

It's is a youth oriented contact lens care campaign that stresses the importance of proper cleaning and tending of contact lenses amongst university students. The campaign arises due to an increasing trend of contact lens usage by youths for the purpose of a beautified appearance. However, a negligence to properly contact lens care results in a higher risk of eye infections and other eye health problems. "At First Sight" hopes to communicate the message of prioritizing eye health above appearances because the sights you share with your loved ones are the sights truly worth keeping.

As you can see from the difference in font style and size, I copied it from their website HAHAHA!

But you can check out my video here!

But remember to like their page and my video! :)

But the point is! It is important to have proper contact lens hygiene and it's so easy to have eye infections (I had it like at least 3 times) so please take good care of your eyes!

To know what to do, you can watch my video and DO NOT do whatever I'm doing, or you can check out their website here:

http://www.projectatfirstsight.com/

will be blogging more about it so stay tuned!

All about us.

2012-01-22T23:23:00.002+08:00

HE IS WE - All About Us

Take my hand
I'll teach you to dance
I'll spin you around
Won't let you fall down

Would you let me lead
You can step on my feet
Give it a try
It'll be all right

The rooms hush, hush
And now's our moment
Take it in, feel it all, and hold it
Eyes on you, eyes on me
We're doing this right

Cause lovers dance when they're feeling in love
Spotlight shining, its all about us
its all about us
And every heart in the room will melt
This is a feeling I've never felt
but its all about us

Suddenly, I'm feeling brave
Don't know whats gotten into me
Why I feel this way
Can we dance, real slow
Can I hold you, Can I hold you close

The rooms hush, hush
And now's our moment
Take it in, feel it all, and hold it
Eyes on you, eyes on me
We're doing this right

Cause lovers dance when they're feeling in love
Spotlight shining, its all about us
its all about us
And every heart in the room will melt
This is a feeling I've never felt
but its all about us

Do you hear that love,
they're playing our song
Do you think we're ready,
oh I'm really feeling it
Do you hear that love,
Do you hear that love
(repeat 3 times)

lovers dance when they're feeling in love
Spotlight shining, its all about us
its all
And every heart in the room will melt
This is a feeling I've never felt
but its all about us

Cause lovers dance when they're feeling in love
Spotlight shining, its all about us
its all about us
And every heart in the room will melt
This is a feeling I've never felt
but its all, all about us.

Zouk!

2012-01-19T21:10:00.001+08:00

White party @ zouk!

we look like smurfs! hahaha

Visual Inspection

2012-01-18T21:12:00.002+08:00

Went for my first visual inspection today!

visual inspection is something you carry out every 5 years to check if a building well maintained and if there's any structural cracks which might be alarming or that needs to be fixed.

And i went Cedar Girls' school today.

It's located in such an ulu place i had jinquan drive me there hahaha.

Supposed to span over 2 days but luckily it's all done today because it's so tiring!

From 9.30am to 6pm today, it's basically non stop walking and climbing and it's so humid and hot i wanna dieeeeee lol.

the ONLY good thing is probably the cheap canteen food there hahaha!

Let's take a look at what engineers do during Visual Inspection!

Climbing up ladders to look above the false ceiling..

And you have to climb up this scaffolding to look above the hall's false ceiling......

..... TWICE!

LOL.

everytime my mentor come back down from the climbing she look like she just ran 10km or something hahaha super tiring and scary!
Plus for the second one she was standing on top with no railings or anything to hold on to so she was holding on to the bangla hahaha!

super mai ming lol

Opening up false ceiling!

And before we started the visual inspection, the person from facilities management was telling us Cedar Girls' is one of the school with the best equipments (translates to rich lol) and i was like okayyyy.....

but oh my god i totally wanna study there hahaha!

The whole building is so nice and they have dance studios, art theatrette, auditorium, choir room called music space or something, nice band room, and blah blah blah lol. Even their D&T was so nice and unlike my school's D&T room. Theirs looked more like a playroom..? i dunno it's just very nice. lol

and this is their..... i guess music lesson? Playing the piano and using mac to record and edit what they've just played? for every single one of them?!?!

Gosh im totally born in the wrong era.......
for some reason, kids these days are very well nourished because almost all of them are taller than me lol. but still the same because they also looked very childish ahha

im so tired!

Gonna sleep early tonight because i have a long day tmr too.

Nights to all you great poeple!

New blog post!

2012-01-16T22:48:00.004+08:00

Hello hello!

ahem ahem this is seowjin bloggging from macbook air!

hahaha so nice!

havent posted photos in a long time shall patronize everybody by posting 10 photos lol!

but there's nothing much happening recently so it's fine hahaha.

but i've started work recently!

It's the second week this week and it's good!

People are nice, friendly, helpful....

but CPG is much bigger than what i expected haha. I thought their office is only like 1 floor but i only realised on the first day of work that there's like 6 storeys :/

and what i'm doing now is totally what i studied oh mannnnnn

been referring to textbook and notes while i was designing the reinforcement lol like a noob!

and now i understand why working people have tummy lol because you only sit, eat, and sit and eat and go home and sleep lol.

I foresee myself becoming da jun already hahaha

Joseph's Birthday at Goodwood park hotel!

Booked a split level room and because it comes with a kitchenette we had a cooking competition haha

hm i made lao ban tou hua.

not the best lao ban............. but pretty much taste the same LOL.

Guangzhou trip!!!!

hahahaha so fun!

It's like tour for one day, free and easy the other day for all 3 places and i think it's good!

it's more flexible and really much more enjoyable;)

the other time when i went hongkong with jinquan we keep thinking where should we go the next day la.. so stressed haha!

My favourite drink: Milk tea!

okok i MUST mention this.

The KFC in China is sooooooooo goooodddd!!!

we eat it EVERYDAY.

And their milk tea is a must drink!!

milk tea and KFC..? WHAT?!

dont go together! but it's really damn good. please go try.

My work station in CPG!

That's my notes in the pink bag.

Trying to calculate the amount of reinforcement required lol.

Bought a tumbler for work!

and this sushi craving of mine is lasting longer than i expected haha
been eating sushi express alot recently too.

We will have lunch/dinner there almost everytime we walk past it lol.

and that's Liujun and Don in the photo haha bumped into them at sushi express so qiao laaaaa but lucky for us, we have them to hijack good sushi for us LOL

And he's unhappy because everybody is saying he has ugly hair:(

BOYCOTT ZOOMSALON IN MARINA SQUARE!!

hahahaha

And one last photo!

Taken last night when we were watching star wars together lol.

Promised him to watch star wars together for probably one year already haha finally!

And it's nice:)

okok that's about it!

And stay tuned for interesting posts coming up!

Will be blogging about some event:)

hahaha this is a busy week cos i have visual inspection and site visiting this week can't wait!

Hope everything turns out alright because this is so worrying hai.

blogging

2012-01-12T20:43:00.001+08:00

Hello!!!

byeeee!!!

CRAVING

2011-12-17T19:20:00.001+08:00

Recent craving:

SUSHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2011-12-06T00:42:00.001+08:00

Dear Holidays, I'm so in a love hate relationship with you.

But don't worry, I still like you better than Examinations.

:)

Taiwan!

2011-12-04T20:07:00.002+08:00

Flying off to Taiwan in a while!

taking the midnight flight so i guess i won't be sleeping tonight already.

and having slept only at 5.30am last night/this morning, i can already see a very grouchy and impatient and tired seowjin with very dark eye circles lol.

tired max!

and my stomach is aching!

bad timing..............

hahaha see you all in a week!

I HATE THIS SEM

2011-12-01T23:44:00.002+08:00

I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM I HATE THIS SEM

but................... it's finally over now:DDDDDD

I know i'm gonna do so badly this sem. didn't study much and no time to study at all.

but let's just concentrate on the happy things.

HAHAHAHA HOLIDAYSSSSSSS

...but jinquan is not around:(

Helpful.

2011-11-28T18:20:00.003+08:00

Hmm... Sometimes when I see a friend around me in need, i will offer them my help even if they didn't ask me or say anything.

But it's not because I want something back from them

It's because it makes me feel happy and I was also hoping that if I need help one day, they are willing to offer to help me too.

But sometimes i'm really too helpful for my own good and people don't like it because they find me too nosy. And it makes me sad.

Because it makes me a bad person. a bad bad person.

What is the point of studying so hard.

2011-11-21T14:54:00.004+08:00

I'm 21.

I'm in college, 3rd year.
I have friends, family, and a boyfriend.

I have a laptop.

I have a car.

I don't have to work for my own allowance.

Life is good.

But yet I'm unhappy.

Why?

Why am I not doing as well in my studies?

All along, I have been working so hard for my degree and aiming for a good honors.

I struggle every semester and I am totally convinced that studying is NOT in my blood.

I mean of course, there are improvements. But all these improvements are not enough.

Not by my standards, but by the standards of the society.

I am always very happy over the little improvements I get when I work hard.

Things are fine. good.

But the pressure comes in when people start asking for your GPA.

The look they have on their face when they heard my gpa:/

They always go "ohh..." and then look away.

seriously, what's wrong with you?

Especially when friends in year 1 ask about my GPA.
EVERY ONE OF THEM is so hopeful about their GPA, thinking they can get a 4.8.
which explains their look of despise.

I keep telling myself, i must get good grades, i must get good grades.

But this semester is really so stressful I am going TO DIE.

I have cried so many times because i was too stressed over studies.

How can I do this? 7 papers? noooooo.........

I am really starting to regret taking this course.
If i had known the workload is gonna be so heavy and a gpa of 3 is like the norm instead of maybe 4, I would definitely not have taken engineering.

Like what peiyi says.. the entry requirement is inversely proportional to the workload.

And with all the competition... seriously?

You hear year 1 engineering students complain about their workload...

but now i kinda miss my workload in year 1:/

content is actually quite the same as what you have studied in JC. just that i didn't study hard enough lol.

Actually it's only heavy because it's the exam period now la lol

But all I wanna do is just to prove to the others that I am capable of doing well.
and esp now with jinquan, I don't wanna seem so weak in front of his friends and family like I am doing badly in university. I really don't wanna see that look on their face anymore when they ask about my gpa.

But then again..... i ask myself, why am I doing all these?

What is the point of studying so hard?

The focus of studying now to me is no longer gaining knowledge anymore. It's is about doing well in exams and getting good grades.

And seriously, as long as I pass all the subjects, I will be guaranteed a degree.
What's with getting a good honors and getting a good gpa?

A good job with a good pay? really, that's all that is gonna define you? I still have a degree. I just don't have a good gpa. It doesn't mean that I'm gonna die on the streets or I am not gonna have it better than you in life after that.

I feel that there is so much more to life than results for us.

Yet everybody are like slaves to their gpa, working their guts out for it.

At the end of the day, everybody still gets a job, everybody will still have their own family and will have a good life. A good life by their own standard. (maybe except for people who are living in self denial thinking they are gonna die alone)

What I really wanna do now is to take the stress of results and grades and just study like it is so fun.

Change the focus, change my life.

Relationship.

2011-11-14T22:54:00.001+08:00

LOL realized our relationship have reached another kind of 境界 already.

I don't know how to describe it.

but it feels so close, so homely, so warm, so so so funny, so nice:) hahahaha

SJ.

2011-11-10T23:53:00.001+08:00

谢谢大家的支持！

Poverty.

2011-11-10T01:54:00.002+08:00

The way out of poverty is education.

Bad habit.

2011-11-03T14:44:00.002+08:00

recently I realised i have a very bad habit.

that is if i like certain food so much, i will spam myself with that food.... alot.

Just a few weeks back I really really liked cinnamon melts. So I ate it almost everyday for lunch and supper until i'm quite sick of it.

Then after that I suddenly find oreo like superrrr nice so I ate it for breakfast before going to school, one more on my way back home while driving and at night i will eat it again. And yes i'm quite sick of it already. by the way, if you dip it in hot milo it's super nice cos it'll turn soft and it just melts in your mouth!!! hahaha

So recently i found new food at home: Digestive biscuits.

I know it doesn't sound very appetizing because it's like so healthy and all but no IT'S SO NICE!!!!

i dunno how they made it but it doesn't taste plain at all! (or was it supposed to be plain lol i dunno)

And i liked it so much that when i wake up in the morning the first thing that comes to my mind is : digestive buscuit! lol

but one thing bad about it is that it's very dry.

and I even had diarrhea because of it (?)

and then i had sore throat.... then cough...... then flu..... then yesterday i had a fever.

SERIOUSLY? DIGESTIVE BISCUITS?

LOL. ok maybe it's just a coincidence.

but if you're interested, i lost 1kg because of this whole thing so.... you may wanna go try it out? LOL just saying.

okok back to video recording! :(

i hate exams

29.

2011-11-01T17:55:00.001+08:00

We're 29! :D

time is passing so quickly!

Let's do something special next month when we hit 30:)

hahaha love you still.

2011-10-29T17:34:00.001+08:00

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SO FUNNNYYYYYYYY

Hall

2011-10-22T15:47:00.002+08:00

There's so much stuffs I'm looking forward to:)

There's exams (-.-), there's Taiwan and Hongkong trip, there's Guangzhou/Shenzhen/Zhuhai trip, there's competition, and then there's attachment at....................

wait for it.............

CPG!!!!!

and also GSSSSSSSSS WOOOOHOOOOOOO

though it's unconfirmed on my part, i most probably will be studying there with Jinquan!

hahaha

and I'll be applying hall next year so I can't wait to stay in hall for the first time in my life too. haha what a noob but it's one room to MYSELF UH HUHHH

ok everything is not confirmed yet so i'm keeping my fingers crossed:X

but the exams part is confirmed la

around

2011-10-20T23:08:00.001+08:00

Like it when you're around:)

it seems like my problems are halved with you by my side :D

Primary school

2011-10-20T18:24:00.003+08:00

Gosh, I miss primary school days..... so much.

Where no one is gonna judge you, life is so free and everyday it's just about where should we go play after school. Block catching, battle tack, colour jump, eating prata opposite school and at the playground near my house.

It was so fun.

no pressure, no nothing.

Who cares about studies then seriously?! Okay maybe roy lol

it was just about playing and all the bitch fight (uh huh..), and forming our own band, thinking of band names, waiting for buses with our best friends at bus stops and the crushes that we have.

the only stress we have is the card game which we were playing with UNO cards.

Although i may not be the prettiest, the slimmest, the smartest, the most fashionable or the most likeable, but i am pretty sure I was definitely the happiest me in my entire life... until life took over:(

Who am I

2011-10-20T16:48:00.003+08:00

Crybaby

2011-10-19T17:19:00.001+08:00

I am a crybaby

2011-10-19T00:14:00.001+08:00

study study study!!!!!!

Forever and Always:)

2011-10-17T22:55:00.001+08:00

Forever and Always by Parachute

Go listen! It made me cry so much:(

Treasure people around you before you don't have the chance to anymore:)

Time management

2011-10-17T18:12:00.003+08:00

So many people are saying that they're busy and that they have no time. Busy with schoolwork, with projects, with assignments, with quizzes and with other activities.

Be it work or school, people always complain about how busy they are and so on.

But i feel that it really all boils down to time management.

If you're busy, it may be because your workload is heavy. But i feel that it's largely about time management. and maybe efficiency. Especially at work, why do people keep saying they're busy like we don't know? And if one is having OT so often, i won't see it as this person is very capable but rather this person is very inefficient.

The workload that we have now as compared to in the future is so minute. So if we can't even handle it now and manage our time properly, what will happen in the future? Moreover, on top of work, we still have our family to think about.

I used to think that my workload is very heavy too. And it's so unfair! But now that i think of it, It actually reflects rather bad on myself:( Like I'm so incapable:(

It's all about how you look at it.

I know everybody is very busy, but please, relax, take a deep breath, tell yourself that it's all manageable and you can do it, keep your cool, and carry on.

Don't let work control you.

It should be the other way round.

Alright, jiayou ba!

FATTY BOM BOM BOOOO

2011-10-17T00:21:00.003+08:00

gosh i keep eating and eating these days im gaining weight and i feel so fat!!!!

but i feel like eating cinnamon melts now LOLLLLLLLL

oh my god this is a vicious cycle

2011-10-15T15:09:00.001+08:00

Lol won another denizen $30 instant win hahaha

2011-10-14T22:17:00.001+08:00

Seriously?! LOL

Cravings:X

2011-10-14T00:38:00.001+08:00

feel like eating four fingers:)

and I have a piece of good news!

What would you choose?

2011-10-11T18:11:00.002+08:00

You know how cosine graph is shaped like a valley?

If my life is like the cosine graph, it's at its second cycle now at its lowest peak.

Things are so not going smoothly for me recently.

I totally failed my structures test, did badly for my foundation engineering test, and i was rejected by CPG for my attachment next semester.

I feel like my life is so screwed up. What have I been doing!

While some try so hard for just one chance, some get it even without going through the interview.

And really, it all boils down to portfolio and good results. But I have none.

Been thinking about a question recently. Assuming that good results and having a uni life is mutually exclusive, what would you choose?

Right now, I will totally choose good results over everything else.

But my curriculum this semester is the hardest it has ever gotten and I am really struggling with it. I don't have the kind of "engineering sense" that people have, and it is all so hard for me.

Am i really suited for this course I have no idea. What will be of me in the future? If I were to make that difference, what am I supposed to do now? I am so lost.

I really want to improve myself.

I want to have self discipline, i want to have good results, i want to be a better friend, i want to be a better girlfriend, i want to be a better person.

I am so not enough.

I am not trying to compete or anything. But the system is moulding us into competitive people and it doesn't allow you to slack for one second. And if I don't push myself now, I am afraid I will regret it in the future..

and I want to be the one responsible for my own future, not circumstances.

But of course, it's all easier said than done.
Convinced that I have no smart genes in my blood, I hope I do survive this sem and get a good company for attachment.

I guess I really need to step up my game :(

But on a lighter note, I got the $30 denizen instant win from macs! haha new jeans for me!

I'm thinking about

2011-09-27T18:38:00.001+08:00

gosh it's so addictive I'm thinking about it still haha

二人世界

2011-09-25T13:55:00.002+08:00

Realised although jinquan and I spend alot of time together, i still prefer it when our friends are around and get very happy when they talk to us like we're all only friends and not like we're a couple. don't like it when people feel awkward around us esp when we're not even doing anything!

McDonald's monopoly

2011-09-22T17:19:00.001+08:00

HAHAHA

our tutorials

2011-09-04T22:34:00.001+08:00

our tutorials. haha

left-mine.
right- his.

snoozing!

2011-09-02T22:48:00.001+08:00

everytime when my alarm goes off I DUNNO WHY but I will always take a screenshot of it when I snooze it haha.

look at this morning's:

and then the next thing I new when I woke up, it's 10.45 lol!

so I was late for like my whole day of lesson.

sian now I have to watch video recordings!
#firstworldpains

and now Jinquan and I are using laptop in tampines mall while waiting for our movie at 2350!

lol no different from 2 person out on a date but using iPhone each. just more nerdy lol!

Smith's authentic British fish and chips!

2011-08-29T03:11:00.001+08:00

Went to Smith's Authentic British Fish and Chips today!

we heard alot about the restaurants along katong road but didn't really have a chance to try it out so since we had some time today we went to try it:)

it was recommended by Jinquan's friend slyvester and quoting him "it is very cheap!"

but oh boy what wrong timing did we go.

student price is only from Monday to Friday so we had to pay $11 for my dory fish and $17 for his cod fish and chips!

and his cod fish and chips wasn't even nice to begin with lol.

but my dory fish was nice:D

I am not some food expert but I THINK the batter is sweet and so it taste very good and quite to my liking too!

then we went to the ice cream gallery!

the place was tastefully furnished and it was so cute! like they had bookshelves above and it's like this very artsy ice cream place kind of thing. dun really know how to describe it so you go visit yourself! hahaha

we ordered banana split! it's the only one without an artist name cos they had ice cream like picasso dilemma and da Vinci concoction or something haha.

hmm nice weekend:)

and it's 2 more days of holidays!

oh just now after watching zookeeper Jinquan and I sat down at mcdonalds eating mcwings and we were discussing about religion, Christianity, atheism hahaha.

quite interesting!

and a different kind of conversation for us lol.

okok sorry just a random thought of mine haha found it very fascinating.

alrighty I shall sleep already good night:DD

cute!

2011-08-29T02:47:00.001+08:00

hahaha so cute:D

so bored.

2011-08-27T19:01:00.002+08:00

im so bored!

so i shall upload some photos up! hahaha.

because i feel this blog dying already but NOOOOOO it shall not!!!

hahaha

had pork ribs the other day with jinquan at cafe cartel!

i had medicine before that and the drowsiness kicked in so i was struggling to stay awake when eating this hahaha. which was so hard! but luckily there's always desserts lol

okay im reminded of this thing i heard on the rude awakening

"people say no matter how full you are, there'll always be room for desserts.

yes, they're in your thighs."

LOLLLL who still dare to eat dessert now ah!

okay maybe yiqing still can hahaha

did another quiz on the iphone and they say jinquan and i are very in love <3 !! hahaha

and louis cant do this quiz already yay!!!!

jinquan's new MACBOOK AIR!!!!

so cool i want one too:DDD hahaha

and my car continues to amaze me with higher range everytime lol.

really super save fuel la.

you know my fuel tank is only 42litres but it always shows like 600-700 for range.

jinquan's car's fuel tank is 55litres but the range is only around 400?

so small car still better!

okay actually do you all know i have a car? LOL.

I AM NOT HAOLIANING but realised i didn't mention it here haha.

so it's a birthday gift from my parents:D

just a second hand car for me to go to school haha.

so i don't have to wake up so early anymore yay:D

and every morning on my way to school i still cant help but be amazed by HOW IS IT POSSIBLE FOR ME TO OWN MY OWN CAR OH MY GOD HAHAHA and then i'll like laugh to myself for about one minute lol.

and driving halfway everytime jinquan and i will always say "有车就是爽!!!!!!"

okok i shall go enjoy my long weekend ALONE already. and yay ntu got monday off:DDD

and i shall end off this post with

I LOVE NTU!!!

hahaha dunno why but nowadays i really think ntu is very cool lol!

i know it's very ulu and all and that's what i like!

like we have an island to ourself !

and because we're so far from town and all that, everybody really dresses VERY comfortably and the professors are all so nice and they really quite have 人情味:D

and that we always criticise NTU so openly like NTU is so bulliable hahaha

like even profs criticise ntu la so fun!

okok i shall stop before people from SMU hit me haha

OK HE CANT BECAUSE I'LL BE ALONE THIS WEEKEND NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

sian

k bye

I need to learn to be alone.

2011-08-27T18:42:00.002+08:00

School has started.

and everything is gonna change.

Jinquan wont have so much time for me, and i'll need to study too.

We cant meet everyday like we used to.

We can only meet on weekends:(

and i need to learn to be alone.

can't always count on him to be by my side.

sometimes i wonder how did i used to live when he wasn't by my side.

like how is it possible to live so lonely?

hmmm.... maybe i had better things to do then.

hai it's gonna be hard, but i will try.

to be independent:D

His Banana Chin

2011-08-25T12:46:00.001+08:00

my idea of Jinquan's profile. Hahaha.

sexy!
his new nickname: banana chin.

LOL

and it's a long weekend ahead:DD
though banana chin wont have time for me :((

Mental Age

2011-08-21T22:26:00.001+08:00

hahaha my mental age is 44 LOL.

but I think it's quite true, cos I'm not the kind of person who will go party all night or play all sort of games hahaha.

....
....

...

oh no okay I think I'm boring-.-
lol.

just wasting time

2011-08-17T18:22:00.002+08:00

Sitting at PS BK now wasting my time while waiting for Jinquan.

luckily I brought my laptop!

hahaha. if not i'll be so bored.

hmm ok since I have some time I shall just update a little about my life.

My school had started and i'm totally hating it. Because there is so much to study and the most sucky thing is getting stuck at the FIRST question of the tutorial. Like you need knowledge of your previous modules and I totally cannot remember it lol.

Few of my friends started school in NTU this year also but I havent seen them except erm Germain? haha I guess because most of the time I'm in the North Spine while they're in the South Spine?

And also i fell sick!

It was raining heavily 2 days ago but I was wearing t shirt and shorts plus the LT was like damn cold. My hair stood up so straight like I just rebonded them in an anti-gravity field lol.

And my lips turned purple LOL!

Now i'm quite convinced that actually my face really quite 没有血色.

and peiyi was like "wa your lips turned purple! I've never seen purple lips" hahaha

interesting.

Okay I have nothing much to say so I shall end off this post with this:

I despise liars and fakers.

BYE!

okay the medicine is starting to work i'm feeling drowsy and BK is getting rather crowded I don't know if i am supposed to get up of my seat to let them have it lol.

school is starting tmr

2011-08-08T00:39:00.000+08:00

SCHOOL IS STARTING TMR:((( AND ONLY NTU:(((

manhatten

2011-08-03T23:54:00.002+08:00

OOHh!!

i was having dinner at manhatten fish market and i saw

Leon Jay Williams

and belinda lee!

hahaha.

thought i saw wrongly but i saw them waving to people waving back to them so cannot be they know everybody in the room ba! hahaha

and belinda lee is so small and thin!

cos she looked quite big on tv I THOUGHT? LOL

means people who are thinner than her will be like super duper thin :X

gosh. feeling the stress for them already haha

okay gonna end off this post by saying

SMU SUCKS AND BYE BYE

LOL

My holidays

2011-07-31T13:19:00.013+08:00

OH NO MY HOLIDAYS ARE ENDING:(((

hahaha. this time our holidays are so short la!

cos of YOG:(

but i didn't take special sem this time so i least i get to play and rest and nua and have fun and spend time with jinquan! haha

but so sad he have so many camps to attend and all sian.

but i actually cant wait for school to start also!

cos so many people are coming to ntuuuuu yay:D

i'll see them around often also:) hahaha.

not so alone anymore lol

anyway a little update from my holidays !

my grandparents' da shou

random meet up and looking like a crazy woman hahaha

the day i got into a fight with jinquan's condo management and broke down crying and YET HE DOESN"T WANT TO UNCLAMP MY CAR SCREW YOU MANAGEMENT

Genting trip!!

first buy in genting! hahaha

jinquan didn't go so no choice but to tango hahaha. but the connection was quite bad totally cant see what he's doing haha

Pizza for dinner

fish and co for lunch and loving it:D
at 1Utama

hellojinquanjuyindoesntlikeyouhahaha

haagen daz strawberry cheesecake woo

阿一鲍鱼 for brunch on the last day haha!

and there i spent my last cent. LOL

Room we booked for Juyin's birthday!

and it comes with a hot tub!

do you know what is the difference between a hot tub and a jacuzzi HAHAHAHA

kaiwen and lucas with SUPER long hair lol

advertising haha

we each prepared something for juyin.

jinquan and i did like a musical for her haha and i had to learn a korean song lol

and they danced!!

i love this photo haha

wow wow somebody is the superstar!

the next day at lucas's house with his hamster haha

TRYING TO 放开 haha

went to collect balloons for juyin's party at fort canning!

there were so many we cant see nobody LOL

and i was the host!

hahaha

everybody thinks im getting married haha.

only after 2 years? LOL i not so ganjiong please hahaha

it's finally meeting jinquan's secondary school friends:D

because he always dun wanna bring me out i dunno why!!!

like he doesn't want me to meet his friends:( haha

on the way to watch NDP and laughing at jinquan's face LOL

丑爆了 haha

almost cried at some points of the parade haha.

especially when they sing 'home'

it always make me tear haha

dunno why lol

and jinquan bought us a matching bear hahaha!

i love this drink

such a big lighter i think only my parents will buy haha

i wish...........

favourite snack!

competed with jinquan on our reaction time and i did it the best:DDD

hm school starting soon i dunno how i should go about doing it.

still lost.

a lot of cores this sem i think i will die of studying

hope everything turns out fine please...................!!!

and cannot wear until damn ugly to school already cos there'll be so many of my friends there:DD

need to buy more clothes! hahaha

Fish and co!

2011-07-22T23:32:00.000+08:00

Fish and co in Malaysia!!

so cheap!

It's like the same price but in ringgit it's crazy!!!!!!

wanna go back and eatttt!!!!

hahahaha

Genting

2011-07-11T23:15:00.001+08:00

Going Genting tmr:D

hope i have a lot of fun!!! :DD

yay

cut or not?

2011-07-06T18:57:00.004+08:00

anyway..........

my hair is quite long already and i dunno if i should cut.......

i actually love short hair cos it's so convenient when you go out, when u shampoo your hair, when you dry your hair and easy to manage!

but i havent had long hair for some time already :X

so you think i should cut my hair????

:XX

EUROPALACE, online poll, metatrader, Virgin Games, Casino Las Vegas

random pictures

2011-07-06T18:09:00.004+08:00

random pictures time!! :D

Jinquan's going to be very busy this whole month so he took some time off to spend a week with me:D

haha all the camps and school and stuffs.

we're gonna spend so little time together lol.

which is kinda good?

and not good?

you know now that we've been together for 2 years plus, there's really this mixed feeling when im with him.

okay throughout the 2 years that we've been together, we meet up ALMOST EVERYDAY.

and we stay over at each other's house SO often haha.

like out of a week, 5 nights are spent together kind of thing.

so.......... it's quite................. SIAN? to see him everyday? hahaha

it's sian having to see him everyday but when i don't, i wish he was here with me.

so.......... i also dunno what i want haha.

maybe we need some time away from each other lol.

which we are going to have:D

okay la i think you all also dun wan to know so much ba hahaha

kk pictures!

the one week that we had was basically spent eating and eating lol.

and seriously now that i have a car, i feel like im living THE LIFE.

like we just travel around where we want shopping and eating and looking around and talking lol.

and it's actually kinda fun calculating the parking fees and all that haha!

like after what time what time is per entry, how much is per hour and which shopping centre has the cheapest parking fees and all that lol!

and iphone parking apps rocks LOL

eating chicken wings and meatballs is ikea:D

KFC buddy meal:D

sakae sushi

four fingers at ion

really good chicken wings according to jinquan haha.

i think it's....... not too bad? dunno leh lol.

bought a portable charger from gmarket cos we reckon it's the trend and everybody need one haha!

and nice shirt!

couple watch!

and my favourite of all time!

his is KFC and mine is this :D

kway chap + orh lua :DDD

woohoooo.

and i've been eating so much i shall not lie i gained some weight hahaha!

went swimming with juyin and jinquan just the other day to TRY to lose some but not really helping cos we were just chatting and 泡水 lol.

okok shall be more hardworking to lose the extra pounds before genting comes :DD hahaha

going genting next week with joseph yiqing and juyin:)

yayyyy

USSSSSS:DDDD

2011-07-06T16:32:00.007+08:00

US at USS:DDD

hahaha finallllyyyyyy:))

went there to celebrate our 2year anniversary!!

oh my god cant believe it's 2 years already:X

time passes so fast lol

Driving there:D

Police with police car

is this the correct side?

or this..?
but he looks cuter with this though haha:D

clown

clown with protruding chin

wearing the crown:)

too cool for the crown lol

love this photo haha it's my desktop background!

hiding from 大君

pretending not to see 大君

大君 is coming oh nooo

where is she?

where is she

大君 is evaporating up my

yay new phone:DDD

hahahaha.

okay sorry this is very short and lame post lol.

cos it's holidays and jinquan is at camp and i have nothing to do LOL.

im friendlesssssss lol.

watching big bang theory on my own at home now hahaha.

anyway, holidays are coming to an enddddddd noooooooooooo

noooooooooo

i still have much that i havent done!

NOSE

2011-07-01T22:42:00.000+08:00

hmm..

think i have a 肉 and fat nose i dont like it LOL

2011-06-30T12:50:00.000+08:00

the moment

2011-06-19T19:16:00.001+08:00

My first time..........

.......eating an oyster!

ta dah!

and almost died.

not nice at all LOL

脾气暴躁

2011-06-18T02:49:00.001+08:00

我的全家人都脾气暴躁。
说话不可以好好说
一定是喊来喊去

生气骂人时又尖酸刻薄
而我这么在意的人什么话都会往心里放
因为我相信就算是气话
一定有一部分是认真的。

我就是没用，没用头脑想。
就是笨。

我很悲观。

所以我真的真的很想死。

拜托让我死了吧。

我的全家人不会听人解释
也不讲道理。

而我以前也是这样
但我不想这样.

but this is in my blood.

so 如果我死不了，
我希望我的孩子千万不要遗传到这点

或者我以后不会这样对待我的孩子

because I know how it feels like
and it doesn't feel good.

please let me get through all that is happening now

if not, just let me die.
my presence is just a burden to this world and to this family.

I hate myself so so much.

and if I really die........

yay because I don't have to study anymore!!!!

$1300

2011-06-17T14:27:00.001+08:00

should I lose that $1300?

money is so important.

2011-06-17T02:19:00.001+08:00

it's sad to know but i have come to realize that money is really so important.

so so so important.

with money, you can buy all the things in this world.
with money, problems can be solved much easier.
with money, people look up to you.
with money, you probably are just more lovable.

with money, you can speak louder.
with money, you have more choices.
with money, you can look better.
with money, there is just so much you can do.

but sadly on the other side, without money, there is not much you can do, you need to 看别人脸色 and you can only 忍气吞声.

because seriously, who's gonna listen to you if you have no money?

that's just reality.

you might say no, and that family will not talk about money.

sorry to tell you, but this doesn't work in my family.

or extended family.

money is such a sensitive issue in our Koh family. so many people fall out or just do not talk to each other because of money.

in my family if you're poor or you have a problem, people just avoid you because they do not want any trouble upon themselves.

so so so so many examples already.

I never thought this could ever exist, but we are like fair-weather family.

they want to share the happiness, but not the problems.

ok digressing from the topic a little, but they are so mean to each other. not encouraging at all.

you know, in the past I used to be very fat. my cousins and aunties would always laugh at me for being so fat.

they always make me run errands, an their reason for doing so is because "你这么肥，你需要做一点运动减肥。哈哈哈" but seriously they're just lazy. and they're also not very slim what-.-

when I was in secondary school, I used to fail maths very badly. instead of being encouraging, my father scolded me for like 1 hour, calling me useless and spewing vulgarities at me, and even calling me 垃圾桶.

when I was in primary school, my elder sister and this cousin of mine were very close. they used to exchange letters often and there was a time I secretly read my sister's letter. And they were actually talking bad about me behind my back and laughing at me. about me being disgusting and about what I said. my cousin even quoted me. "我喜欢银色因为它白白亮亮的，很漂亮"
saying I sounded stupid and mean
things which made me cry after reading. But come on, I was only 8 or 9! what intelligent things do you expect me to say at that age?

my elder sister was from normal academic stream. she had to study 5 years instead of the normal 4. and my auntie will say 读五年有什么用，四年才有用 right in front of my sister. just because her daughter was in express stream-.-

and that was my definition of family from young. not loving, competitive, can't wait to see you fall, wants to benefit from you, likes to talk behind your back and likes to laugh at you.

so so so wrong.

you might think I am being very calculating and 记仇 because I remember so much stuffs but no. it's because they are all my childhood 阴影.

I was so afraid of them.

I grow up in a family of not love, but probably sarcastic comments-.-
and that is why I am so 在意 about things people say about me. I am constantly being judged. even in my own family.

ok ok think I digressed a little too much lol.

but anyway since I'm on that topic, I just wanna say that this view was changed when I got to know jinquan's family.

his family wasnt so mean to each other, and they always compliment each other. his family was more 大器 compared to my family. like they talk about stuffs and spend time together because they know spending quality time together as a family is important. they celebrate occasions together and they're all so nice and friendly. they buy stuffs for one another and his auntie will always give him money to spend.

but the only time i see my auntie give us any money is probably when Seowmin gave her winning lottery numbers. and it was only for Seowmin also lol.

anyway because of his family, over these years I try to quarrel less with my family and I seriously almost don't 顶嘴 already. I know when parents scold us they don't feel good, they're frustrated. and they probably don't mean what they say also. if I were to also feel frustrated, we would end up quarreling, and I will be crying, things will get awkward, and situation will be tensed.

I always try to think logically, and the consequences of my next action. and always before I finish thinking, they would have finished scolding lol. I know my family all is 脾气暴躁 so we need to have a balance.

although sometimes I just hope they treat me nicer also and don't have to be so 刻薄:(

okokok I admit.
it's because if I 顶嘴 my mum would end up crying and shouting "我不会做妈妈啦！"
then win already lor LOL

okok back to money.

what I wanna say is......

有钱你就能说话大声
没钱你就只能忍气吞声

especially in this family.

true story.

Home alone

2011-06-13T21:59:00.001+08:00

home cooked food:D hahaha.

drinking with family!

2011-06-10T21:50:00.001+08:00

free to be green!

2011-06-05T04:56:00.001+08:00

you have a choice.

choose to be green,

and the difference starts from you. :D

Can You Believe It.......................

2011-05-19T02:33:00.002+08:00

My exams ended!!!!

WOOOHOOOOOOO

and WOOOHOOOOOOOO AGAINNNNNN

HAHAHAHA

SHUANGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

but i still have the EID project la. siannnn.

gonna meet up with group members everyday to do it lol.

it's gonna be a miracle if we even manage to print the poster on time haha!

5 days to the exhibition and nothing done lol

im so screwed for this sem i think this might be my last sem LOL

so funny

2011-05-10T23:48:00.002+08:00

just re read some of my old posts just now and i think I'm so funny HAHAHA

amazing how I even came up with them lol

now

2011-05-10T23:41:00.002+08:00

I want this to be over.

google

2011-04-30T01:44:00.002+08:00

i google translated this 哇超有心机啦 and they gave me this....

.... wow super friends with brains.

LOLLLL.

that makes all of you 超有心机啦！

HAHAHAHA.

2011-04-13T22:40:00.002+08:00

The Climb - Miley Cyrus

I can almost see it
That dream I am dreaming
But there's a voice inside my head saying
"You'll never reach it"

Every step I'm taking
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking

But I gotta keep trying
Gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down
But no, I'm not breaking

I may not know it
But these are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most, yeah
Just gotta keep going

And I, I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on

'Cause there's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb, yeah!

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Somebody's gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb, yeah!

Keep on moving, keep climbing
Keep the faith, baby
It's all about, it's all about the climb
Keep the faith, keep your faith, whoa

critism

2011-04-08T18:39:00.004+08:00

sometimes i think i talk too much.

so much no one appreciates your talking.

so i think i better shut up.

wanna puke.

2011-04-08T15:42:00.003+08:00

Hmm.

been thinking and doing anything and everything except studying lol.

feel like puking whenever i think of studying haha.

this sem please be faster please.......

and nowadays i secretly hope that............

the world REALLY ends in 2012. HAHAHA.

ok so evil

then let's hope that only my world will end cos maybe i will die?

but if that's the case can i just die now:(

sometimes i will think.

if i really get hit by a car, or somehow im gonna die, the thing that will flash past my mind is probably "oh my god, i really don't have to study anymore? wooooooo........ "

and then die.

HAHAHA.

photos even i feel ashamed of.

2011-03-29T22:28:00.000+08:00

okok.

everybody, calm down....

you might be interested to see this hahaha.

recently i found very old photos in my hard drive. and after looking at them for probably 60 times and FINALLY accepting myself, i decided to share it with you all :D

because it's not just me, it's EVERYBODY LOLLLL.

especially if you were close to me and we take pictures often, BEWARE!!! MUAHAHA.

but the bulk of the photos were secondary school photos so yeah. and i have family photos tooo~~ i only picked out a few to post because there's simply TOO MANY photos haha. maybe on faceboook? LOL.

starting with the recent ones:D

my 21st birthday party!

wooohooo if you were there the other day, you're one of the rare few i invited hahaha.

really invited rather few people and i think half didn't come or something LOL.

but oh wells THEY MISSED THE FUN WHATEVER.

uni photo! when i still have looooonnggg hair plus perm somemore!

i think i really prefer short hair man haha!

wow peiyi looks like she lost 20 kg or something haha

and seowmin suddenly becomes part of my clique LOL

jinquan as officer:D

ok i think it's called inspector.

so they do less physical training compared to OCS but do more.... thinking? lol

OH MY GOD AM I ARMY TALKING NOOOOOO

social night:D

dinner and dance:)))

prom!

aaron with his dog~~

and he's holding it because everybody is snatching to hold it

2 eyes. All i want is poke aaron's 2 eyes for doing that

liujun and his purple specs and my braces and I

so cute!!

but this will never happen again:(

i look so weird.

and he looks so thin.

you may not see it, but under his uniform, there's actually like 12 pacs LOLLL

ookay that's so gross.

i was pretending to be a rose and shihan a sunflower.

HAHAHA

OH MY GOD I LOOK LIKE A MAID.

in australia.

if i'm not wrong i was at one of my heaviest in my entire life. hahaha.

but im covering it well lol

alicia and gina!

ok i think i look fine here haha.

and gina didnt change la!

oh my god this..........

in the background are toilets in sentosa.

and im looking constipated.

actually not.

i was having a tummy ache and i just came out of the toilet............

and it still hurts.

hence my face.

HAHAHAHA.

but obviously gina thought i was fine already LOLL.

alicia talking to her son , gina having a stomach cramp, jacqueline being stabbed in her back and me craving for some carrots

okok the real maid is here hahaha.

and atun are you reading this lol

MY BELOVED LOVE HANDLES OH MY GOD OKOK SKIP THIS PICTURE

AND THIS

AND THISSSSS

okay this is safe. haha.

so pretty!

i have no idea why my hand is in my pocket haha! i look like some gangster

you must be glad i went to get braces LOL

hello from singapore!

my form teacher napping in class haha!

saw her the other day but she doesnt recognise me at all:(

yikee, liujun and me

i look like i was beaten up lol.

OHKAY OHKAY i'm starting to regret for putting all these up already.....

HAHAHA WHAT IS THIS

attempting to take a jump shot

hello i am suribriyani from indonesia and this is rontipranta from sri lanka.

dangling earring haha!

im totally over that man LOL

i used to have dangling earring whenever i go out and wherever i go.

yunzhi and I with a very low tech camera still HAHAHA

HAHAHA im actually the only one not from their clique.

and they took this picture so they can cut out my face and flush it down the toilet bowl so i will die of drowning HAHAHA

my 15th birthday party!

im so glad liujun is over that hairstyle ....

....and that im over this hairstyle too LOL

sec 3 chinese new year.

and i just rebonded my hair or something people think im sooo pretty HAHAHAH

hi 杨过

im wearing the same shirt from on top but i look much slimmer here i realised haha

and the ghostly person behind is jinquan.

HAHAHA NAHHH JUST KIDDING

am fascinated how i used to smile last time

class 2F

oh my tian did i 吸毒 or something LOL.

and yeah, that is zhilin's favourite pose hahaha!

..... okok and mine too haha

jun, it's not working.

and i shall end off with this!

because i look pretty here HAHAHAHA

traumatising.

if you see your photos here and you want to sue me please contact my secretary

Dunex Ist @ 76-494-321-456-443-dont-tell-me-you-are-really-gonna-call

hope to hear from you soon!

HAHAHA

recess week.

2011-03-14T18:04:00.000+08:00

Hello people!

i'm back because........ it's recess weeeeek!!!

hahahaha.

woohooooo love this week lol.

though there are like SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much to catch up!

okokok i shall go do my formal report, tech comm report, concrete report, tech comm online activity, watch e lectures, do tutorials, study for test and then continue blogging hahaha.

bye

Compare.

2011-02-27T23:10:00.003+08:00

COMPARE.

Photo 1

I'm the one on the extreme right

Photo 2

Im still the one on the right lol.

I LOOK SO BLACK I CANT SEE MYSELF LOLLL.

ok maybe the lighting was darker then.

but why am I like 24 shades darker than yiqing?

waaa.

but then again if I am even darker than photo 1 perhaps...... maybe........ probably.....

HAHAHAHA.

ok no no noooooo

i was just joking

Weekend:D

2011-02-12T01:54:00.002+08:00

IT'S WEEKEND!!!

I hope..........

this weekend im able to win a lot of money from mahjong, have fun going out with friends, have fun going friends' house and finish my tutorials !!!

really wanna catch up on school work before it's all too late=X

have a fun weekend everybody:D

overload.

2011-02-07T20:57:00.001+08:00

Oh my goodness i am taking 9 modules this sem with 8 of them being core modules.

watch how i die.

I'm back!

2011-02-06T20:17:00.002+08:00

hey im back from cruise!

with an additional $280 USD.

HAHAHAHA.

oh my god, are we professional gamblers or what LOL!

damn funny.

we kept playing roulette and cash out when we earned a little, went back to our room to count the money, laugh laugh laugh, went to to play again, win abit, cash out, went back to our room to count the money, and laugh laugh laugh and went to play again hahahaha!

sound so noob lol!

but super fun.

i think the dealer must think we're crazy la haha.

we see some people sit there for 6 hours straight of roulette though.

dunno if they win or lose.

scaryyyy.

anyway!

school starts tmr and i've been missing ALOT of lectures i need to catch up SO MUCH.

I think im pretty much dead this semester. siannnn.

don't get what the lecturer is talking about AT ALL.

must be because jinquan ORD everyday can GO OUT GO OUT GO OUT WOOOOOO!!!

SHUANNNNGGGGGGG!!

and he's been crashing my lectures almost everyday haha.

and sleeping in almost every lecture like a real undergraduate. lol.

actually i dunno if anyone is still reading this blog because people rarely have blogs these days i realise. mostly tumblr. so...............................

i guess i............

am still sticking to blogger.

hahaha.

im on twitter though!

and still on facebook.

im so afraid people are sian of people seeing the same thing here and over there and get sian and abandon me leaving me all alone in the world of blogger talking to myself laughing to myself and crying to myself and i will die of oldness in blogger.

oh my god............

ok actually maybe not i think i will still have louis with me HAHAHA!

sorry for the randomness im just blogging whatever that comes to my mind lol.

okok i'll go have dinner!

恭喜发财 everybody!

and just leave the 学业进步 to ME HAHAHA

HAPPY CNY! :D

can't stop loving you.

2011-02-01T16:00:00.002+08:00

happy (105-78+97+(5*8)-(49/7)+9-(976*1.8*0*8)-126)th month together:D

Of making fun of each other, scolding each other, hitting each other, pinching each other's mouth, stealing each other's money, spending each other's last cent, depending on each other and of course....... loving each other:D

Love you!

.

2011-01-30T23:13:00.000+08:00

我还不能举起白旗

要不要都看我自己.

定情信物。

2011-01-27T21:07:00.002+08:00

oh no:(((

i lost our ring:(

sorry you.

school

2011-01-26T01:38:00.002+08:00

school just started for 2 days and already i am hating it hahaha.

not the company, just all the studying lol.

Like you have to go through everything AGAIN.

and yesterday during school, my structures lecturer probably just gave the most memorable lecture of my life hahaha.

cos he kept going on and on about how civil engineering is so good and bad at the same time lol.

some examples:

"Stop talking. Please feel lucky that I'm here teaching you for free if not I can go outside and earn $5000 per hour for a lecture"

"I am one of the top 5% earner in Singapore and I am a civil engineer. Who says civil engineer don't make money? Environmental students, I'm sorry but it's is too late to change course now."

"Feel proud that you are in Civil Engineering because so many people from other countries are dying to me here. It is one of the top few courses overseas and it's because they can't get in there so they come here"

"I don't understand why we even have the course environmental engineering. Why do we need them? Even there IA (Industrial Attachment), and im not joking, 60% are attached to civil engineering companies!"

Shows us a picture of old residential buildings.

"See! No sewage system, we don't need environmental engineers" LOL

"I told my son to not ever study civil engineering in NTU. You know why? Because it's so stressful! Who takes 8 or 9 modules in one sem? Crazy! So packed how to study!"

*nod nod nod nod nod nododddoodododod*

Shows a picture of Taipei 101. "I'm involved in some projects like Taipei 101. Seriously what is so great about this building? SO UGLY! I don't get the Taiwanese." HAHAHA

ok and some other stuffs but seriously he is like super brave.

and omg it's so late already i gtg sleep!

good night people!

Im just dumb

2011-01-18T13:22:00.001+08:00

I'm so stupid I ought to die.

2011-01-16T02:35:00.001+08:00

OMG I AM SO FREAKING SCAREDDDDDDDDD

Burlesque!

2011-01-15T01:08:00.003+08:00

Just caught Burlesque(Bur-less-k) at Tampines Mall and it was so good!

Likr right after the movie i said i want to watch it again hahaha.

maybe because it was very entertaining i dunno.

just very nice! haha

and i met Louis at Tampines Mall when i was having dinner at Texas Chicken (KFC still better jinquan says haha)

anyway i said hi to louis, turned over and saw Philson LOLLL.

anyway just got back from my 6days KL trip+3days cruise trip haha!

i think i know Malaysia rather well now lol

and jinquan love the KL trip so much i think he's snatching my friends away HAHAHA

a short post:D

2011-01-12T14:06:00.002+08:00

high fashion

hmm, just wanna tell you that although we may be like the other couples and sometimes we find it weird why are we not like that, i think we're really funny, special, cute and loving in a good way together:D

I FEEL LA.

hahaha who knows there may be 5000 people hating us out there LOL.

today is no special day, but i just wanna say :D

HAPPY ORD LET'S NUA NUA NUA NUA NUA THIS HOLIDAY AWAY!!!

hahahahah yayyyyy

LAlala.

2011-01-05T15:34:00.001+08:00

I WANT TO CHANGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

random pictures.

2010-12-27T17:00:00.000+08:00

wooo feels so good to have time to myself :D

hahaha.

i really like nua-ing man lol.

just that recently i can't fall alseep i dunno why.

even if i do i'll wake up after about 5 hours.

which is really bad.

who in this world have no time to sleep during holidays haha!

anyway, i've taken up knitting (again) recently!

sounds so............... 黄脸婆?

but wanna accomplish something this holiday so this shall be my goal lol.

although im afraid i may not find time to finish it.

upload pictures when im done!

haha talking about pictures, i realised i havent been posting pictures up since school started lol.

so since it's holidays i shall post them up :D

and you shall get them NOW.

like NOW.

oh man i need this so much.

sometimes i think i do not trust life a lot.

even though somehow things will just happen i feel like there is still a possibility that they do not and think too much and get into a depression and start to eat and get fat and get pimples and oily hair and jinquan will dislike me and break up with me and im all alone by myself while he runs away with somebody new he met in his university who is like 100 times prettier than me and so much nicer to him and they'll bump into me on the streets while im with my best friend (maybe a hamster) and they'll laugh so hard at me i felt so humiliated i ran away and get hit by a scooter.

LOL. think too much haha!

an iphone app which brings the neoprint machine to you haha.

new car?

... NOT SO SOON!

you know jinquan has always been good in physics.

is it because his name is related to quantum?

like jinQUANtum?

but im also related leh.

seowJINQUANtum.

ok sounds too mian qiang. haha

christmas at the paragon!

KFC everyday :D HAHAHA.

which is true cos i think we eat KFC at least twice a week.

sometimes thrice no joke.

on the train :D

this picture is supposed to be sweet but i think my hand looks so man here it kinda reminds me of labour front.

or something like this haha.

an underwear pyramid!! HAHAHA

don't like this christmas tree hahaha.

I'm on tv:D

okay actually im just on reverse sensor camera HAHAHA.

look what happened to jinquan's head LOL.

and guess what's inside?

lui bin.

haha.

HAHAHA cropped this picture the other day when i was trying to convince him to take up muay thai lol!

vegetarian food at ntu :D

awww.

broke joseph's birthday present to me on my last day my exam:X

maybe it blocked something bad for me.

lost the 'e' and i ended up bring SOWjin LOL.

KFC again after MOM paper that day haha.

and that paper was a disaster:(

like i'm blinded by some ghost super blank mind

orh hor!

lao cui nua!

HAHA

saw this car the other day!

my handphone number :D

after exams going BBQ!

havent seen a railway track in 20 years haha

christmas!

scores 137 the other day playing 'retrying' HAHA.

anyone playing words with friends?

play with me!!!

LOL.

anyway, met up with my primary school friends yesterday!

and they were all like saying "seowjin, 你可以坏一点吗？"

which means "seowjin, can you be a little more rebellious?"

LOL.

and throughout the whole thing they keep saying i study too much ask me don't be so nerdy and if my mum asked me to be more rebellious instead of being so obedient.

hmmm..

feels weird to be the "nerd" in a clique haha!

but feels very smart at the same time LOL

okok i shall try to be a little more 坏！

rawwwrrrrr

okay im feeling it im feeling hahaha

Nightmare.

2010-12-25T12:55:00.001+08:00

Had a nightmare last night and woke up crying.

:(

Bad Christmas.

exams are oveerrrrrr!

2010-12-21T13:01:00.002+08:00

Oh my god, i cant believe this sem is actually OVER.

like. O.V.E.R.

hahahaha.

And this sem made me love studying and hate studying SOOO much.

at the start of this sem, i told myself i NEED to study harder because THIS will be the cause to whatever happens in the future. This degree means a lot to me.

And it really isn't easy having a local uni degree afterall.

Come to think of it, I am actually the first in my family to be studying for a local uni degree. I don't want to let people down by getting bad grades and wasting my whole uni life.

And so, I've done it.

I think I have tried hard enough.

in fact, i studied even harder for this sem than like... A levels.?

(er which explains my shitty A levels results HAHAHA)

Okay this post is going to sound so bad if I get all Ds this sem. LOL.

hmm. I may not get good results this sem(you know bell curve sucks), but at least i know,

I've tried.

and now IT'S TIME TO ENJOY!

it may be short, but it will be well spent nua-ing here and nua-ing there HAHAHA.

WOOOO CAN'T WAIT!

hahah i love this picture :D

Tough people.

2010-11-20T22:16:00.001+08:00

Tough times don't last,

but tough people do.

Diamond is a girl's best friend

2010-11-08T22:47:00.001+08:00

IM GETTING MARRIEDDDD :D

cockroach

2010-11-07T00:47:00.002+08:00

Oh my just had the fight of my life with 2 cockroaches in my toilet.

one half big, and one small.

no offense to anybody but i killed the small one and i "guided" the half big one down the drain.

gosh.

are there charkwayteow in my toilets how come i always see cockroaches inside -.-

i have so much to say.

2010-10-31T17:30:00.003+08:00

i really don't know what to do now.

this morning my mum pulled me out of bed to bring me to the kitchen to scold me.

but having slept at 3am the night before studying german and 5am the night night before baking carrot cake, i am probably not used to waking up so early.

so, while she was scolding me my head was on the table and there was this constant gushing of blood FROM my head (till i felt so cold in the head) and TO my head (till i felt giddy) and i was wanted to lie down to rest.

but she expected a reply from me.

i remember she said sth like "do you want to study or not do you want to study or not!"

and i said "yes. but you said going to the library to study was a lame excuse for reaching home late."

I SWEAR I ONLY SAID ONE SENTENCE

and she said "aiya 每次顶嘴顶嘴，你不要以为你很了不起hor，骂你不可以是不是。读大学很了不起啦！不可以骂你啦，你根本没有尊重我" and walked away.

i was feeling so weak so i rested on my hands and she came back scolding me again and all those.

untimely, but i needed to pee so i said “我上厕所先”

and she said something like "scold you then u must go to the toilet.........." and blah blah.

and oh my goodness i don't even know where i was going la.

i sat down on the toiletbowl feeling giddy, i stood up and almost fainted. i washed my hands and wanted to just go out and lie down because i dun wan to faint in the toilet.

im not exaggerating but i swear i cant even see where the lock of the toilet was because i felt so giddy and everything was a blur.

so i went out and faster held on to my mother (who was still scolding me) but she pushed me away.

so i fell to the floor and I REALLY THOUGHT i was going to faint like i keep thinking "oh my god am i fainting am i fainting" LOL.

then i like crawled my way back to my bed to rest.

hai there is no point in this post.

just wanna record down how my mum dislikes me and how it felt like when one is about to faint haha!

feels like she doesn't even want to communicate with me, but more like she just wanna scold me, and when i dun reply she asks me why do i not reply.

when i do reply, she just go on and on about how i dingzui and how im not respecting her and how i thought i was so liaobuqi because im in a university.

for goodness sake, nobody said going to a university was something la.

so many people are going to university and i merely made it to an engineering course in NTU, not even NUS.

what is so great about it.

and im struggling inside because i have to worry constantly about my GPA, and about failing my exams and how in the world am i supposed to absorb so much things in 3 months.

not to mention all the scholars around.

GOSH.

problems all come together.

im feeling so stressed up about constantly having to think about catching up in school, avoiding conflicts at home, and how to make enough money to want what i want. and also friends. hai my mind is about to explode.

i really have so much to say about my family. i mean there's so much problems im facing now with them. okay, not just problems between us, but also issues that i see in my extended family. like how everybody is so self-centered and how money is such a sensitive issue in my family.

but who am i to deal with such problems and when i already have so much going on in my head and around me.

nobody understands how i am really not who i am in the past.

i try so hard.

but i fail so hard.

it doesn't matter if you all don't understand what im talking about because it was not meant to be understood anyway.

hai

i want to die.

i really want to die.

movie and dimsum

2010-10-20T01:41:00.002+08:00

movies............. 2 down!

YAY :))

caught Reign of Assassins and Detective Dee recently!

this is like one of the best things recess week have given me haha! (stupid formal report)

and tmr, i'm going for DIM SUM BUFFETTTTTTT OMG I HOPE I REALLY BU FEI HAHAHA.

2kgs, here i come!

yayyyyyy

movies.

2010-10-09T19:02:00.003+08:00

Wow i havent watched a movie in soooo long. lol.

Last time i use to watch a movie like at least once a week, or twice a week.

now................

no time :(

there's so many movies i wanna watch these days!

Like 剑雨！
because I wanna watch 大S hahaha.

And Dinner for Schmucks!

haha I love Steve Carell!
He is so funnily lame and humourous and i dunno but i like him! haha

though im not sure about the director lol.

And Detective Dee! hahaha. i wanna seee Andy Lau!

and the show feels nice. that day juyin they all watched it and she said it's not bad haha.

Charlie St Cloud!

actually i read the synopsis it doesn't sound very nice but i guess it's a must watch because it's starring Zac Efron? hahaha. not that i like him but i feel this need to support him LOL

Coming soon!

And You Again because i love Kristen Bell too haha.

and yes, i like the movie "when in rome" hahaha.

haii. I guess I can only watch the movies online when i'm free :(

sian.